Heart of the meek.

the blinding ray Shone threw the haze

bringing to light the truth of mine gaze

listen not to words of man

but sooner follow the trail of sand

Where sheesh may safely graze

Pity about how things turned out;

but i never thought it turn this way.

You were just a friend (no more);

and i never intended for you to sway.

Your thoughts differ from mine,

and really they're out of line.

I can tell your pain;

but i can't take your blame.

Would u rather i had ignored you?

I'm sorry but i am not them.

So don't expect me to do what you are used to.

and stop being defensive like a clam.

It is true that now i don't understand how you feel;

but truer still that i never understood your thrill.

So i hope that through your self-imposed winding maze,

you'll find your way to where sheesh may safely graze.

The Morning Benders - Virgins (Exclusive new track for Blogotheque)

All my lovers around me like virgins screen today
Waist-deep in the water, pushing my body away

What makes you go, to put the past away?
Oh how many drops can you squeeze out to explain
What happened one day?

And one of them stays behind and trails me from afar
I saw her eyes, lit up like colors in the dark
But when our faces met, I was half a world away
It still shot in my breath as I turned to say

We meet another way
Where you wont recognize my face
Can we meet one way or another you wont, you wont
Speak up, speak up, speak up

When we meet one day you won’t recognize my face
When we meet one way or another you wont you wont
Speak up, speak up, speak up

And one day it suits me, the next it simply leaves me dry
It comes on like a lifetime, it passes into morning light
How beautiful it was to be anything at all
But somehow it strikes me, the timing came a bit off

When we meet another day you won’t recognize my face
When we meet one way or another you wont you wont
Speak up, speak up, speak up
When we meet one way you won’t recognize my face
When we meet one way or another you wont you wont
Speak up, speak up, speak up

A wine and a smile.

A nice low-key chill out evening.

Had a nice dinner with special-k at the vines@novena and treated myself to lobster/ribeye combo set with a nice red.

We later adjourned to Haato@ulu pandan for icecream and waffles on K's recommendation. T'was good i must say.

There's always something nice about having a nice glass of wine with someone whom you've known for ages. In the moment you tip your glass to your lips, this air of nostalgia fills the air. For that moment in the bustling restaurant, it was almost as though time grinded to a stop, as poignant moments that we shared came to the fore.

T'was not too long ago when we sat side-by-side outside KK Hospital's 7-eleven, each having ourselves a jelly-slurpee-sundae after a morning training session. It was a funny moment that i'll always look back upon with a lot of fondness. We were two 13-year olds planning to start a swim school together. Grand plans indeed. Haha. Interestingly enough, while our mutual friend has actually gone ahead and done just that, we're still sitting on that blue metal bench enjoying our ice creams and each others company, except that the blue metal bench of the past was now stylish wooden tables and chairs at Haato :) If there are times where fate cannot break the bonds formed by man, this could possibly be one.

As two 12 year-olds, we were set on paths that would see us become totally different people. In many ways, we're complete opposites. One a Blue and gold in heart, the other a green warrior. He was the ever-quiet aspirer, focused and determined. Me the loud-spoken philosopher, seeing things differently was my forte. He had everything that i lacked, drive and focus. We'll be in rival schools, and then take on different areas of study, in rival universities. He's always got everything planned, me unplanned. Our backgrounds cannot be more different, our ideals different. Somehow, one way or another, like the sun and moon, the earth couldn't get rid of us.

And as suddenly as time stopped for me, i find myself in the present again, as the bustling sounds of food being served, topics being shared, orders being taken, flood back into my consciousness. The blur of my surroundings gain focus again as i find myself sitting in a family-oriented restaurant called 'the vines'.

Lost for words i am suddenly.

...Good wine, my friend, good wine.

in a daze

天使の微笑み

A Quartet of Characters.

Ode to mane;

Recluse to light;

Yelp of beak.

-

Click of keys;

Surfing of sites;

Yielding to thoughts.

-

Sinking of posture;

Ache of spine.

-

Adhering to noise;

Beholden to notes.

just another afternoon

birds fly home, dawn to dusk, why cant time pass just as fast.

monotonous voice, lights are dim, i feel like eating ice cream.

mind starts to wander, eyes are heavy, now i feel like mash potato with gravy.

playing of gongs, arms start to ache, an afternoon slice of cheesecake.

Shaun Ang, 5th October 2010.

It's a certainty.

A life is time;
they teach you growing up.
But the seconds ticking killed us all
a million years before the fall.

The key ingredient

I think that i have discovered the key ingredient that keeps friends together~~

Reliance.

Expectations

in construction.managing expectations.

stardust.

You light the skies up above me.

A star, so bright you blind me.

Don't close your eyes.

Don't fade away.

Yeah you and me we can ride on a star,

If you stay with me girl, we can rule the world.

Yeah you and me we can light up the sky,

If you stay by my side, we can rule the world.

If walls break down, I will comfort you.

If angels cry, I'll be there for you.

You've saved my soul.

Don't leave me now.

My red sky

If you'd float into my red sky,

I would love to make you smile.

hair of red

hair of red

nothing being said

he walked past the gate

while she wait

she wonders, "why is he late"

guess its just my fate

but it has already been made

lets just go on a date

-Shaun Ang 28th Sept 2010

Peripheral Alertness.

The sounds of button crunching as the person perched behind me checks his mobile. The blinking of the girl beside me blinking with her mascaraed lashes. The twitching leaned head of the bloke beside me cross-armed. Two chairs left she chuffs her handouts on the table to align them. The girl in front sits hand on lap listening intently. Beside her another girl scribbles incessantly..

It seems i've zoned out totally at approximately an hour and a half into class.

If one concentrates on the sounds around them, it's really hard to attain silence isn't it? Perhaps silence is actually a state of mind. *ponder.ponder*

War and peace.

We Laugh

We cry

We fight

They die

-

They talk

They lie

They cheat

We die

-

It's a farce.

We'll all die.

-

So Here,

have some of mine.

And i'll take your wine.

And then we'll show them,

that we men,

we'll walk hand-in-hand.

-

“I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ.” -Ghandi

My world on 26th of September 2010

A change of perspectives

A change in flair.

A change of views

A change of hair.

He turns on the news

and for the moment he weeps.

For all the hatred

and blood in heaps.

Now why can't we all get along?

in Jeruselem, in Siam, or in japan~

What're all our children among?

How far can this violence span?

They tell us this:

The greatest thing as they live,

Is to love and be loved in return.

But they should just learn to love.

and not the rewards that love should give.

I've learnt alot

but all i have not.

i save it for my brother,

and one day we'll save each other.

She learns something new,

something she never knew;

But she gives up

cos it's too much for her to chew.

But i am wrong.

He is wrong.

They are wrong.

She is wrong.

We're all wrong; And that makes us alright.

a very white and pristine moon.

Teo Heng is the type of name the usually precedes some sorta food...for example you could have Teo Heng Porridge or perhaps Teo Heng Tao Sah Piah...but karaoke?! Certainly sounds as beng as it gets! Moreover, when i called over to Katong shopping centre to make a reservation, the attendant greeted with a "wei?" That certainly set the alarms off.

Anyhow, the place was quite nice in actuality. The scene i envisaged prior to arrival was a shoddy broken-down small room with not-so-good equipment but a pretty good song selection (what ah bengs lack in style they make up with good song knowledge). To my surprise, it was well-lit, and acceptably spacious (but ours was a 'medium' room, so i fear for the small rooms), with OK sound systems~ The best part really is that it's kinda no-frills so they don't include drinks in the package and so the room we got was like $20 for 3 hours, and $10/subsequent hr?! madly cheap IMO~ If you want canned drinks they cost something like a dollar each which is pretty affordable too! I'd totally recommend it in spite of its dodgy name that only bengs/lians would know it haha! I would pick it over Kbox anytime!

Company was good as usual with the music-gang! Special mention goes out to CSY who was sick yet still made it down, and drey who came rushing down from school after data collection. EVERYONE could sing, which made things less fun, since normally every group i go with, there's always at least 1 person who cannot sing properly, which makes things less serious and more funny! Yesterdays' gang seemed at least half-conscious of how they sounded, literally glued to their seat when singing, and nobody screaming (bar myself), no one standing up to dance, no ridiculous acts! haha. We really should've just gone wild lah!! Anyways, since when was going to karaoke about Singing properly?! It's really about having fun and doing funny things isn't it? lol. I felt it a mild outing, yet one cannot even start to find fault with the nicest company on earth. It's always gives u an innocently wondrous feeling meeting up with the music-gang.

After that we settled on $4 dollar chicken rice which ended up being worth the extra penny~~ Over dinner came the inevitable discussion of Roasted Chicken vs White chicken. Where did we ever learn that roasted chicken was basically leftover white chicken put into the roaster? It's probably knowledge (or myth) passed down from generation to generation, and although i can't quite validate it, i'm sure i'd tell my kids the same anyways hahahaha. Also, i learnt (to my detriment) that 'bai cai' and 'xiao bai cai' is not the same~

True to the beng-ethnic that is clearly in our blood, we headed off to the pool parlour to satiate our thirst to stoke (or relive) our beng (or lian) fiery roots. Was playing when Shaun asked me out of the blue :"eh how to put 'english' on the ball arh?" hahahhahahaah..sorry mate. Bengs call it 'siding' lol. Although i found it funny, i did find the time to get my ass kicked by them (RY can play pool too) so from now on maybe i need to rephrase my common usage of the word 'siding' to 'english'.

after pool back home we went and then ry and i contemplated running for bus 31. Luckily we decided against it, because we (only later) realized that 31 did NOT stop at the bus stop we were waiting at. Running would have been bad on the knees, and seriously would have been a total waste of effort! so we backtracked some 400 metres or so to the previous busstop on the other side of the road junction. That's when i looked up into night sky to appreciate a breeze coming through and saw the very prominent white moon peering down through a cloudy starless sky~~ When the moon captures your heart it holds you captive, and so i remained solemn for the entirety of the way home (sorry RY lol.)

Well, to be exact, i was pretty solemn right until the end of the trip, when i noticed the pair perched in front of us were very possibly practicing lesbianism. and so i input into my mobile "girl or boy?" to ask RY. And then she stared blankly and then replied,..."huh i dun quite get it" followed by (in a louder voice) "WHAT 'GIRL OR BOY'?" At that moment my solemnness just got smashed into a million fragments as i wondered in the silliness of the embarrassing situation i suddenly found myself in! haha. Unfortunately for me, those two were less than 50 centimetres away so i'm PRETTY sure that they picked up on my 'innocuous' question.

Reaching home, i was dead tired so i spent an hour or two online and on the telly before me and my solemn-again mood retreated to the pillow.

Now these 3 remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is Love.

when is it OK to take a chance?

It's our faults that make us who we are.

I notice that it's become nigh impossible to know someone well enough when all u know about a person is his good deeds. Somehow, a stronger relationship is when you know everything bad about a person, and yet you still accept him for who he is. Now that is a strong friendship isn't it?

It's pretty weird cos this should be counter-intuitive. When a person is a good-doer, it's only natural that it's easier to befriend him, since he is more likely to be of benefit to you as opposed to someone evil. So why is it that i feel so much closer to those whom i see failing everyday?

Perhaps it's because i know they trust me. As i trust my sins all my friends, those who let me in on their wrongdoings (in the hope of finding peace/advice), are those that trust me enough, and on trust does a relationship ride.

Anyhow, in a world where everyone strives for perfection and goodness, it really is our faults that makes us who we are isn't it? Firstly (1), faults are usually the first thing that people tend to spot, because doing good is the benchmark in todays' society, and doing a good deed is simply the norm, whereas making mistakes just stick out like a sore thumb. Secondly (2), we can never truly know a person, if all we know are his good deeds; as opposed to his bad. When we can look beyond that and accept the sinner for who he is, only then can we truly know a person.

*ponder ponder*

Where the mobile phone doesn't work, facebook does.

It's amazing that we don't reply text messages anymore with our usual promptness, and have transferred out resources to reply facebook messages/wall posts! Simply because with iPhone users rife, everyone can now use facebook on the go, when they cannot use their mobiles, they are probably in class, where they may be at their computers. Last week, A friend took something like an hour and a half to reply my SMS but only 10 mins to reply a facebook wall post!! that's when i realized that communicating via facebook posts is definitely the way forward lol (not a fav of mine tho).

Music in a Global context

May yet be the best class i've attended in NUS!

The new SBFSF. Grand vision. Grand opportunities.

The Save-Bryan-From-Starving-Fund (SBFSF) is now up and running. Interested philanthopists feel free to leave a comment for enquires.

.

It is indeed the people closest to you that we tend to take for granted.

28th of july.

I look forward to tomorrow with less than resignation. As time starts to move again, my blurry eyes find release...and my tears splatter against the grey hard floor. In the midst of silence, the sound of saltwater against tile is a catalyst for the flood.

The forecast is rainy for the days ahead.

As one habit kicks in, another dies out. Tomorrow bro, i save my last for you.

Still.

Just like the air tonight, my life is still. It seems as though time stands still. I tell myself to move on, yet the only thing moving is time, and you. And so I mull here, and embrace my newfound nothingness, but still my heart bleeds.

-Still-

Different scenery, same emotion.
All grand plans, now no action.
Sad I was, came back looking for thrill.
But sad I was, now even sadder still.

Halfway across the world
You still carry my heart
On my lonesome bed I curl
Why can't this idiot start?
because you chose to part.

My life a lake with waters still,
A ton of potential this time to kill.
But now I lay here head in hands,
Gone are all the enthusiastic plans,
Now just waiting for a chance to make amends.

Do I really hold you back? Damn it if I did why are u even away from me now?
A month ago u spoke of us surviving exchange. And yet 2 weeks from there u lose your feelings. Is that even true? Why am I so confused?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Chronicles of HV: The lion, the savior, and the toilet

As we left holland v hawker centre, i realize that the my stomach seemed to be reacting to the laksa and nasi lemak combo that was dinner (something i wouldn't recommend). It wasn't the type that brought me to my knees, so i deliberated and decided i didn't have to brave the cubicles, just the urinals, for a piss.

As i was relieving myself, i decided to indulge a bit and let out a slow fart, but to my dismay, it was a bit of a wet one! I rushed to the free cubicle behind me, and pulled my shorts down to the familiar place around my heels, and dropped those nukes that had been weighing me down. As the carnage ploughed through the walls of jericho, i spotted through the corner of my eye the transparent toilet roll holder, and it's lack of cargo. Sighing, i made a distress call to Kenny, who was waiting outside, to come and save me with a pack of tissue! 5 seconds after i put down the phone, a brother in arms called out to me.

"Hello..hello!"...it was a dude from a neighboring cubicle! I noticed a hand holding some rumples of toilet paper! "Here's some! do u need more?" I hurriedly replied "no thanks! and THANKS THANKS THANKS!" I tried to call kenny to tell him that i didn't need saving as things were but was too late, as i heard him calling out to me for cubicle position and a pack of tissue came flying over the door.

Before my neighbour left his glory seat, his hand crept under the partition yet again with more paper. "Better take some more just in case"

Hey who ever said that Singaporeans took no initiative and were not outwardly helpful? :P

Bubble tea, Scotch, and Tears

Thank you all of you who had me in their thoughts~

On a lonely evening in a speeding plane.

-Solemn and Scary Plane Flights-

My Love,

A month ago today i boarded with hope in flutters.

Now i board again with my heart in tatters.

Emptiness that cannot be seen,

with nothing more to give that you will let me.

I in honesty had much fun;

Baking in the Catalunyan sun;

Running for the train in Bordeaux;

and then missing you at Monterosso;

Your favorite Milanese gelateria;

All the unsat gondolas in Venezia.

Like this, i wish time could reverse;

and wipe away all them tears,

but alas it was, in life, my best five years.

I hope tomorrow's beginnings are great;

but sadly i know it needn't be said,

that my best years and memories are now but a shadow;

deep within my infinite soul, there safely stowed.

Go find what you are looking for, my love,

and when you find your purpose to serve,

seek me out once again for there i always will be,

living my placid life in memory.

And now quaking in my tiny seat,

and as takeoff nears i hear my crazy heartbeat.

With no one about me to hold on to,

i reach out my hand rightwards and true,

but pullback on realizing it is not you.

Just like you whisper in my ear:

"sleep now dearie, and soothe your fears.

Before you know it we'll be in the air."

i sit solemnly and hope to see you there.

and feel your hands caress my face,

tracing lines with such grace.

and reunite my incomplete heart

with the fragments that i gave you while you slept,

Drying all our tears that we've wept.

i do and will miss you so,

ci vediamo.

On a dark evening in a speeding train.

-Lonely train rides-

Roles are reversed; Tears are rehearsed

Traipsing alone in the dark,

My existence continues but life is not in verse.

Why this loneliness in my shriveled heart?

Like an anchor in water immersed,

sinking deeper spiraling into despair..

my body and soul incessantly bleed,

unfulfilled by it's only need.

..My dear are we not a pair?

My call won't you heed?

And so....it begins. In search of love.

After a hectic day of first finding out that my flight was a day earlier than what i initially thought (i thought it 1155 when it was actually 0055), i was soon on my way. 3 flights, 2 stops, 1 final destination, many miles. Different people, different languages.

Among the alien languages to me, i understand but one; the language of love.

The irony isn't lost on me. I traverse far and long in search of love. And this journey across seas shows it's love to me. Lovingly perched beside a dubai-bound family with a crying kid in its ranks causing me short-term insomnia. They compensate by teaching me love for a child, and an impatient one at that, constantly reaching for her 'shrek' toy. Love in it's purest form of affectionn, care and hope for well-being. Families of various colour speak seperate tongues, and all convey love. The irony is that it is the very love that i craved, that i shall not yet find. But i will continue to search.

Bliss.

Sitting underneath a giant green umbrella by starbucks, enjoying some iced signature chocolate, having a chat with bro...

Blissful sounds, light music, everyday scenes of people chatting, cars in the distance crawling to where they need to go. Streaks of lightning forks and tears the ashen blue canvas which is the evening sky. Voices are fast paced and slow paced, soft and louder; a crescendo of sounds, and yet from within I find peace. My heart is amazingly calm.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Iron Man 2 and Copeland

*5th May*

Woke up to a shrill buzz from W to be there or be square at cine at 3pm SHARP, or i shall face the wrath of Cass...unfortunately upon reaching at 2.59pm sharp, i realized that i was first to reach! haha so i waltz about inside cine and found my way to fred perry on level 4 for viewing pleasure. 3.05 W reached and i promptly let her know that if we were in the amazing race, cass would've been eliminated :P

anyhow's we went to by tickets and to our abject horror, the vacant seats at cine's 3.40 show were crappy and so we booked the 3.50pm tickets for Iron man 2 @ the cathay. So, walked towards the bus stop 18 dollars poorer and rushed to Cathay for our movie, and also grabbing a Large whipped potato on the way.

Iron man 2 didn't really live up to my expectations cos it was really too choppy and offered little excitement IMO. It was the usual guy exuding attitude and stuff but the action really dropped a notch in comparison the the first film. O wells it's the sequels curse i suppose. Thereafter, headed to manhattan fish market@PS for dinner. Had myself the cheery snapper fish and chips which were pretty good~ i'd say for the price, better than fish & co.

Rush rush rush to *Scape Warehouse (behind Cine) to catch Copeland's Final tour! The show was only ok IMO because i liked their slower quieter tunes. In this concert however, they revved it a bit too much and i didn't like the distortion on those songs (brightest was normal)...Here's a short vid.

10pm meant the end of the concert. Feeling the effects of standing and hollering for an hour and a half, we decided on TGiF at Heeren for drinks and seats. Had the customary G&T and we sat and talked about C's new beau and the key actions required to secure the deal...

1130pm and it's time to catch the last train/bus home!~

*6th May*

Woke up again to SMSes to remind me of my lateness! Greg this time, with a nice reminder of KTV i said i'll go for! That meant rush rush rush again outta the house to Chinatown Party World KTV! Yay it's been ages since i last went karaoke-ing with peeps! Anyways, it was awesome as always, my favourite being those ballads by andy lau, jay chou, liang jingru etc etc.

English songs at KTV just seem to lack that ooomph. Somehow at KTV, Chinese songs are just more emo, and i like them better. It was nice to meet up with the FRU bunch to sing, laugh and talk about the transpirings! and i met Gary the new temp clerk (who belts out an amazing bing yu by andy lau). oooh..and Greg gets a special mention here for doing Lady GaGa's Bad romance (10/10 performance there).

720pm, got myself home in one piece, and settled down over mum's super nice moichoi+stewed pork. There was also this err....how should i put this....failed attempt at a korean tofu soup HAHA,..but t'was edible nonetheless!

Chatted with Jeanne over on Skype till we fell asleep..........zzz..........

*7th May*

1108am, i'm off for an emergency Dental appt.!

In the game of love, results are not important. Just enjoy the game.

Finally got over my fever and flu! Met Daniel today at some absurb hour @ 11am at City Hall to hunt for this Fancy Delight Egg Tarts! Unfortunately, the shop has sadly closed down! and so with dropped heads we headed to raffles place to meet Mark for Lunch during his lunch break!

Lunch was a nice Unagi Don for me, since that's about all i can handle at the moment with the blocks between my upper and lower molars! not to mention my aching front teeth! Mark was nice enough to foot the bill for Daniel and i, and i must say i'm full of gratitude!

After lunch the 3 of us sat at china square for some ginger tea and lemon tea! talked about office stuff, and life after school! At around 1 plus Mark had to go back to work, and Dan and i stayed seated till 2 or so before me got off our lazy asses for a long trek down to tanjong pagar in hope of finding the famed egg tart stall!

On the way to raffles place MRT, we spotted the Great Eastern Building which led me to think that Sw may be free to meet! and so i rang her and she promised to be down in 5! And so i put off my egg tarts yet again for the rendezvouz@Hans (TastyTown) at Great Eastern Life Building! It was kinda sad that only 3/4 of the Fantastik-4 were onsite at Hans and this was because Sw (a.k.a fantastik woman) had forgotten all about mobilizing Zhi (a.k.a. invisible man) even though he was in the vicinity! That said, the 3 of us had the morbid-est of chats about dying and life after the (touchwood) passing of our loved ones or parents~ :/ i've long hated topics like this but it's about high time i faced my fears and started thinking about what could be, what eventually will be, and what should happen.....

4pm came before we knew it, and so it was time to make a move before we got SW sacked ho ho ho! so off we went to tanjong pagar for them egg tarts (about time)! upon arrival at tanjong pagar, we quickly checked out bearings before making progress to TP Plaza which should be about a 5-minute walk according to my super senses. Oh wait. We in fact took something like 25 minutes to reach, and in the hot sweltering weather i must say! I witnessed daniel, who was clad in full working attire, summon the most intrepid explorer from within-! haha....In my defence, a good part of the 25 mins was spent talking to a street-worker who was trying her bestest to promote the Singapore Cancer Society, as well as fund-raise! It was awesome knowing that people still do this kinda thing! Sad thing was though, that so many people whom the few of them approached tended to ignore their very existence and walk right by! The nerve of Singaporeans! After buying 9 lovely egg tarts (which were top class i must say!), we had one *torchlight on* final destination: Novena Post Office MuwahahaHaHAahHAhAHAh *torchlight off*

Crazily enough, we managed to get to novena at 510! Fortunately, the 530pm closing hours meant we were on time, and with time to spare too~ Unfortunately, for some reason, the parcel to be collected had not yet arrived at the post office! sadly, all that hustle and bustle was for naught. O wells, getting there and talking nonsense was fun whilst it lasted :D

Alas, all good days come to end; but from there the night is born. 6pm reached home, 7pm K calls me out for dinner, and 730 he arrives at toapayoh MRT. We decide on KFC for my sake; Large whipped potato shall suit my palate. Thereafter, more nonsense taking is the order of the night, as we take our discussion on love and life and relationships onto the pool table. Winner takes all!

K wins 4-1, and with that the chances of love/relationship is not 60% (as i earlier proposed). For his sake however, i hope he's wrong on this one! O wells, he's had a rough time, so i understand his pessimism, and i also understand my optimism, since i am clearly hoping for the best! So i shall settle on 50-50! comeon SpecialK heads or tails?

After today's discussion, Ks view has got me thinking...that in a game of love, the result is not of utmost importance (decided by fate). Just do your best and enjoy the game (experience).

better late than never

bah! blog upheaval in progress now (it's been a long time coming). and some music as always to soothe the soul! And don't forget to feed my fish! bwahaha love that.

spent 2 hours playing pool with my bro, before coming home to an awesome beef steak courtesy of Mum~ After that i spent some lovely time on skype with Jeanne who's in Brussels now. Playing with some elements of my blog now in trying to spruce things up here! Meeting Daniel for lunch tomorrow and i sure hope i can get up! And wednesday is Copeland and Iron Man 2! At least i've got a good week ahead.

I'm mad hungry now i wish i could bite more with the new installments on my teeth. darn.

o wells, i can hopefully lose weight :P Shower and sleep here i come.

Quiet day, a good day

Woke up late at 2pm, and spent the afternoon/evening in the cosiness of my room. Alternating between tv, Internet, music and guitar, alone-time was therapeutic. Dinner with bro mum dad was awesome with fish pork greenbeans supersoup! Nothing like a rewarding meal!

Going for a relaxing stroll downstairs now alone, on the hunt for a plastic file from popular bookstore.. Whee!

I need more days like this.


.Motif at lobby of my block.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

so fine.

22nd march.

awesome night with kenny and jiale down by commonealth!

The lil' chirpy one who joined us with little care and an unblenching heart sure made me forget about all the evils in the world. Although she had us on our toes to hide our cigarettes and foul language, she was certainly the most welcome audience. The irony was that while she started as our audience (i was playing guitar), she began chatting and even singing as though WE were her audience and she was putting up a show! The rays of innocence pierces even the most negative of grey clouds it seems. aNiways, after a good bout of songs, laughs, and chicken wings, t'was time to retire to home and prepare for today's presentation.

Sitting on my seat of glory and enlightenment (also called the toilet in most countries), a knock came from my bro, and the surprises continue. Relieved, out i stepped and there was my bro bringing gifts of sound and love. Bro went by SweeLee and got us new guitar strings for the guitars (one of which strings had popped). So it was time to give some loving and care back to the world as i removed the popped strings, gave the guitar a nice nice wipe and in return, she gave me a nice shiny glean and a wink and a smile. Bro threw in a capo for good measure and i've been waiting ages for one cos the D.I.Y ones just didn't cut it...and so i played for awhile before logging online to check them slides for today's presentation, as well as upload some old/new photos stashed in my iphone.

Hmm..met frens for lunch and dinner, swam in between, and new guitar strings at night...an eventful day to say the least. So as i turned in, i keep them happy moments in my head, and pray silently that the next time i awaken till i sleep again, i could make the same prayer and with same hopes.

23rd march.

Started the morning early, catching jeanne on skype before i left in a hurry for my presentation/quiz! Class is now over and i think we improved on our first presentation! yay to that! Gonna meet up with Jason Shauna and Nigel in abit for lunch by science faculty! till later, *PoOf* :D

It's been awhile huh..

U just gotta love this place, if u like pain that is..hurhur..
200 warm up
200 freestyle
8 x 50 kicking
4 x 100 freestyle
Warm down

Omg. Only 1k *laughs*...
I should probably do this more often so that Jeanne may recognize me in July! Ho Ho Ho..anyways, to commonwealth for dinner and then home to prepare for tmrws presentation!

Today's a good day, had a meeting den botak jones for lunch with ggjl. Bunked in his room with his bed n guitar..so t'was a soulful afternoon :):):):)

Meeting kk now for some major suaning about lvpl and our awesome season. Bleah.

The good stuff

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Experience that a year 4 student has

Hey I've never noticed the words before!!! Time spent doesn't necessarily lead to knowing more.. Now I just need to convince myself that so that I can sit for tmrw's test with a normal level of confidence.


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Class

6-9pm classes require students to have a ready cuppa coffee on hand.



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Bane of the psychology student

Today I analyzed my analysis.




Today I analyzed my analysis. And here's a yummy pic.


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Hidden meanings.

How true!


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#1 box office at toa Payoh video shop

Awesome stuff. John Morrison the "shaman of sexy" in action! Many uncles gathered around trying to look disinterested and bored, but in reality loving every bit of the action.

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Testing this cool app

3rd day of cny! Did a little visiting and back at home for dinner! Awesome spread as always!! Too bad I ate so much at waraku at lunch! Bleah!


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Internet connection fails

Running out of luck during CNY

Brittany Murphy

One of my favourite actress passed on yesterday..Brittany Murphy was to me one of the most outstanding actresses from my modest range of movies seen thus far. She was a genius at acting, ever the quirky one, but her acting touches close to the heart, and brings out the most human of qualities from her acting, raw emotion...be it happiness, from her laughter, to sadness in her crying, and determination.

An amazing actress she is. And today the world weeps solemnly with me.

which also leads me to think rather morbidly and amazingly about the purpose of life, and how inspiration spreads and feeds. I'm suddenly not so sullen about death, as it wakes us up, and opens our eyes to all the things that we have yet to do...planned and unplanned...what is life was merely a chartered course? If it's all been planned ahead of us, should we or shouldn't we then plan ahead? won't it just pan out all the same? musings musings, and questions to which the answers don't exist in any conceivable human state~ ah wells, so yet again, i'm curled up in a corner, with the only viable option being to embrace yet again "live well, live fully". Happiness merely brings awareness to sadness. Sadness only magnifies Happiness.

for that matter...

Emotions emotions emotions. Are they even needed? i will save that for another day of reflection...for now, shooto beckons!

ION 3 times in 3 days

as the title suggests, i spent lots of time in ION shopping centre, and had lotsa food there, and purchased awesome socks~ sadly just now most of the donuts were sold out at dunkindonuts,..and guys, bread society is just awesome when u eat the bread fresh..awesome stuff.

it's amazing that ivp ended just a week ago and i've put on so much weight since then!~

macdonalds new stamp collection monopoly game is totally killing me! i bought 4 extra value meals upsized today and still haven't won anything! i've got more than 100 tabs to date and still have not won any prizes! darn it! hur hur..

All u happy people, stay chirpy, all u sad people, cheer up! and then the world will be all happy, and chirpy, and noisy, and then i will tell the world to calm down, and stop making so much noise...and then i will repeat the cycle all over again.

i guess, it's better to tell the sad people, hey embraced the feeling y'all, and then remember that shit happens, so that u can fully appreciate the good times when they do come around

also,
France' july 2010 hope u'll materialize this time! tsk!

“If it looks like a duck, and it quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck”

For too long have i been majoring in psychology, to the point where i am awfully skeptical about everything. In a field where nothing can be confirmed and the closest one gets is 'rejecting H-0", it think it's fair to say that i've since lost touch with normal everyday expectations of society.

Why do we think like this? >>>> "even though almost every points to something, it could be that.....so we cannot confirm blablablablah..."

“If it looks like a duck, and it quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck."
Scientist would never accept that. But in not accepting this statement, how silly are we being?
If we continue our search for perfection in an imperfect world, and are unwilling to settle for less, then perhaps we were doomed before we started~~~

Yet, if we act on anything less than perfection, or in many cases, confirmation, then we leave ourselves open to accountability issues when things go bad...but how inefficient are we being in seeking efficiency?

anw, 27.9s for 50 free = fail.

friday.saturday.sunday

friday i swam something like a 30s! progress made.

gonna go for a dip again laterrr!

6th.

swam 1km in the morning. later see how!

4th October

Today really fail..planned to swim at 2pm..but inclement weather meant i had a couterproductive afternoon at munchie monkey's with a new companion called strawberry milkshake!

hope to get some swimming done tmrw!

Whalao. went training today. Final 50 free, rested and swam 33s. i think i've got a long way to go yet..

Putting together my strongest resolve, i've decided to use this blog to spur me on. I need to be able to swim 25s for 50 free in 4 weeks..and a 57s for 100free~

too tired to think of anything else now~
*PoOf*

Finally!

finally got my LoA application approved!

now that's about 3 weeks of stressing coming to a close!

now to find a job and learn to drive! also, i'm so gonna fix all the spoilt light-bulbs in the house, swim, jog, and meet up with friends!

watched 500 days of summer two days ago, and found it quite awesome! it's been a long time since i left the cinema feeling hinda shitty, like a black hole hatched in my soul, making me feel kinda empty~ dun quite know the adjective to describe all that!

to all u friends whom i've been neglecting the past month of so, i'm sooooo back! raRrRr!

new game on iPhone called dungeon hunter. I can sense that it is AWESOMEEE!

laterrr...love hurtssss (everly brothers)

Experience.

Going in soon! and i am filled with fear of the operation. What is it gonna feel like? will i wake up? will i recover? will it be darn painful? will it be go okay? to these questions i was in total doubt, but one thing was for sure. This would be an experience. I resign myself to fate, and i trudge into the operating room

-Operating theatre-

One woman distracts me with details about my name, i/c number, drug allergies and medical condition, as another opens a case of equipment which will form part of my hand for the next 6 hours or so. A needle is inserted and removed, and in place of the sharp burning "ant bite" sprouted a menacing piece of blue-coloured tube which sticked out of my widest vein on the back of my left palm. With the deed done, i ask the doctor what it'll general anesthetic would feel like. I'm obviously daunted and she doesn't offer me any sympathies. What she does do however, is to increase my knowledge on what goes on during general anesthetic…A tube to pump oxygen into my body will be inserted into my nostril and into my body. I will feel sleepy and i will fall asleep. When i come to, i will be in the recovery room, a proud owner of a brand new bloody nose because of the tube in my nose, and will experience discomfort in my throat and nose which wil

l inexplicably lead to coughing and nausea. Also, because i am to be heavily sedated, i will feel extremely drowsy, and will be disorientated. NICE. Time to go in now. So i enter, and everything seems to move like clockwork in here. I remove my robe, and lie face up on the operating table. I am told to breathe in fully from a mask that is connected to a tube. She tells me i will go to sleep soon. And then i remember! Oh no! i forgot to tell my dad not to come to pick me after the operation!..Anyways…Hmm..this mask..It smells funny…weird..plasticky. It smells…almost lik....weir…..weir..err..smell..it….an…..……

-recovery room-

…and i awake…to the sound of a warm motherly voice, which is that of a middle-aged nurse who is at the foot of a contraction i am lying on. Or have i really awakened?…It's hard to tell, since i cannot feel my face, my arms, legs..or anything for that matter. There's a surreal feeling about me. But at least i was prepared. Drowsy i am, with an irritable and dry throat. I try to lift my hand to my nose to check for bleeding. but i cannot move my hand? ridiculous. I doubt i've ever felt so helpless. Where am i? oh yes..i must be in the recovery room. I

struggle to speak. But the only slurs of words that emerge from my hoarse dry lips are "owrididko"? As i struggle to speak, the nurse struggles to hear me. Luckily, she's adept in the local language of the

darnnitikannotmovemytonguecositstotallynumb tribe. She tells me the operation is over and is ok, and the doctor will be in shortly for a short check up, before i am to be transferred back downstairs to rest in the day ward. I plead for water, but my request is overthrown on fears that i may regurgitate it out. To ease my throat, the nurse opens a squirt-tube of saline and begins to squeeze it into my mouth. Interestingly, i don't feel a thing in my mouth, only some hint of comfort down my raspy throat. After so

me 10 minutes or so..(obviously surmised since i couldn't tell the difference between an instant and an eternity in that state)..a doctor comes in to ask me how i am..etc..interestingly she tells me that one supernumerary wasn't found during surgery. In the midst of searching for the shrewd supernumerary, there was damage done to my two front teeth

, and its roots were now exposed..NICE. I attempt to crack a lame joke about a discount on the price of surgery, since i extracted only 6 teeth and not 7, but unfortunately the doctor's knowledge of the language of the darnnitikannotmovemytonguecositstotallynumb tribe i

sn't quite as profound as that of the nurse. So i continue to rest…

…and after a prolonged period of time, i start to feel a throbbing pain in my he

ad. Ah…the effects of sedation must be wearing thin now. Funnily (but not a

t that moment), I still cannot really move my body, weak as it was, so what i did do could be summed as an attempted act of movement. As my head continues to be hit by an endless barrage by some hidden force, I start to writhe and wince..and the experienced nurse offers me some mercy in the form of painkillers. She crushes two panadols, and i sip them up through a straw…the only evidence that i finished the dosage being the empty container which held the load. The panadols don't do me any good initially, but

after what felt like an eternity(5 minutes), the pounding to my brains eased, and i was back at nirvana. I laid my head back onto the pillow, which is the natural thing to do since i was feeling extremely drowsy..and i heard voices discussing wh

at time to bring me back down..and i guess that when the time reached, i saw through my squinted eyes, two nurses pushing me through a hallway, and then a lift, and then i was back where it all began, at the day ward.

-Amazing amount of bone removed from my currently festering mouth-

ouch

okay i went for my dental op yesterday. A painful experience but an experience nonetheless! will update soon with some photos and thoughts! Tis' evidence that this 8-day MC is for fun...

twenty four years and counting (HEY STOP COUNTING)!

leaving the nest early today to go scout for some french breakfast by choupinette at bukit timah road! i hope the coffee eclairs are as good as i've heard! Today's my twenty fourth birthday and i am feeling kinda stumped by what the birthday is supposed to mean..does it even mean anything? Kinda weird that everyone kinda gives in to me on my birthday and it's funny how i get to have unreasonable demands come through on my birthday! So there's this fantasy feeling buzzing about me and that keeps me scouring for some sense of reality...and i find it when i find that i have to give tuition to some korean kids~ haha shit man duty calls indeed! It's always refreshing tho to touchdown to reality! Soooo, It's 1114am and i am in the toilet washing up and preparing for the day, a day i hope keeps itself real, for i dun want to lose sight of the day.

Clean and raring to go i am, gobbler of eclairs i shall be.

and itbegins.com

school starts. and jeanne has checked back into temasek hall. nostalgic is those rooms that brings back so many memories~ one of the things that came to mind was what i used to play during exam periods! it's painfully addictive and very very engaging! try www.weffriddles.com you all! It seriously quite fun! haha we used to blow our entire "night-before-the-paper" wasting our precious tie on this!! gotta go try that one.

Anyhows, today i finally got a group for this module and it is julie who rocks! i really must say thanks! See there is that temasek hall connection there again! today is a little better than yesterday. I seem to be suffering from some sorta depression because of i don't know what! now what that called? depression due to unknown causes. I've tried long and hard to think about why i might be depressed but there seriously is no answer. Some drops of wisdom from those who've been kind enough to counsel me.
----------
According to Daniel Li (2009), even though there seems no reason, there is always an underlying reason that just hasn't hit me yet. Something IS indeed bothering me, i just don't know it. terribly sorry for being so downcast and spoiling dinner somewhat. Yes, i know sunday is supposed to be my day and all but please forgive me for my lack of excitement. I dunno why..but it just is. I've kinda lost that feeling. I just need to find that spark.

Kenny koh (2009) asks if it's because of the dawning of reality. And as i answer no, he turns up the music in the car, "and so it is...". Apparently it's time to feel emo. HAHA. Kenny is just someone whom u need to punch cos' he feels and says some shit that is seriously insensitive, but painfully honest, and often unerringly accurate. Nobody would have him any other way. He is perpetually emo, and perhaps with good reason to be, and i'm starting to think that this emo-demeanor is actually a defense mechanism and is doing well for him!

Hikoto (2009) says that times like that happen, and she gets it sometimes. Hmm.. perhaps everyone goes through some down time. I guess, but one should at least know the reason why one is down no? I've no idea. yes i dunno if it's okay to dunno the reason why one wuld be feeling dunno-what. nuff said.

Lee (2009) says that it's just so unlike me to be down cos i'm such a happy person! So apparently i am a happy person, but then, without sadness/depression, what is happiness? That really is a philosophical question that leads nowhere. I do know though, that this one Lee better organize soccer soon cos i'm just itching to play!

Wee (2009) things i need a red bull and mushrooms, especially the raw type. Maybe what she really thinks is that i need wings, since red bull gives one wings. I need to fly, and i do indeed feel like i need to fly, and it's funny how inspiration can come in a flurry of creative ways. I find myself flying whenever i find comfort in my guitar, that sense of freedom and power is pretty unparalleled. And so i picked up my guitar. The mushrooms though must be some weird fetish of hers. Apparently i can 1-up. sighs.
------------

Onto another subject, i jsut recently recovered(i think..fully..) from H1N1. Overlooking the coughing that takes over from time to time, i feel fit as a fiddle and feel like playing some tennis/soccer/touchrug! But more importantly, everytime i tell someone i just recvered from hiniflu everyone has THAT expression. hm..the " is he safe" expression! apart from hikoto who went as far as to say "damn i wish i had h1n1 so i will have immunisation from the flu virus!"

Wong (2009): "you only felt the sianness of having a 3-day long high fever because u are not working working working, else it would be okay la." haha and so i told her not to worry then i've got the one-stop quick fix to solve the problem of a shitty job! i told her i saved my unwashed medicine spoon in a ziplock bag specially for her to take a whiff or to drink soup with! whilst my saliva is known to have medicinal properties, i suspect that the side effects such a rare elixir may be simiar to symptoms of the influenza virus. and once u get the virus, no school, no work! For those who crave that, please just buzz me or leave me a message! i'd be happy to oblige! tsktsk!~

H1n1 is powerful i tell you. Once u've got it, u'll look back upon it like an adventure! and now i've got immunity, so how cool is that!

Btw, i love the new macbkpro and it's long battery life..it's now at 40% and this is after i've used it the whole day. seriously can't complain about the 5 hour battery life there. srsly love it.

OKay..going to scout for some food with Jeanne now..Mos burger is on the cards. All u peeps who've yet to try the Mos Burger Triple prawn burger shame on u all! It's sumptious! It taste a leetle bit like the chilli crab sauce which we all love so much, but there's obviously no crab in it, just the taste, plus 3 nice prawns ebi-fry style. I currently am loving it more than any macdonalds burger and that says ALOT, since i love macdonalds too!

See you soon Jeanne! HAHA my iphone got no more battery to play games! bwahaha! signing out.

jeanne is playing my iphone...

jeanne is playing with the apps on my iphone...24hrs a day...draining my battery...and she replies like this: "err....*5 second pause*..ya." and "ya.....errr...i mean no...errr...yes." .......

apart from not having my iphone anymore, i also dun have jeanne's attention anymore!! boo!

...

whalaoooo the nurse called in today to confirm that i have h1n1! at least the worst of it has passed. the past two days have been hell cos of the 39degree fever..but my temperature is a whimpsical

day 3

hiya folks. i've been out of action for the past 3 days because of my 39 degree fever.. from which i got myself a 5-6 day MC + home quarantine, skipped my first week of school, and last but not least, seen myself out of action for the past few days, my bestest friend my bed in which i've spent 90% of the past 72 hours here..sighs. i am really dying lying here. i am so waiting for this shitty headache to pass and i can't wait to get back into action. I hate being sick especially having fever cos it causes this darn splitting headache.

just had my first class today after a loooong layoff! it was good, although the module seems more demanding than most~ it's a good wake up call and i think it's about time i started doing some work again! holidays were good but it's high time i touched back down onto reality!

just had the usual midnight bridge session~ twas' a specially good game today! won both rounds of 3-player bridge whee!

alive and kicking

Music finally up! going to NUS soon to jeanne's room to help clean up and help her movie in~ and gonna meet K later to watch 'up'! hope it's good (the show that is...cleaning is never good.)

Macbook so far so good, has yet to pull a fast one on me thus far. let's hope it remains that way~

sigh. school is starting tmrw..i wonder what it'll be like..without my school gang. One's graduated and the other has flown away across the sea! hope we'll meet up soon~ have fun u two~ sighs.

New semester, new friends, new life. Old me.

woot!

new iphone 3gs! and new macbook! woot!

omg..my laptop can last as long as my phone now when i'm playing games! wheee!
bridge time! PoOf!

now now now it's been awhile hasn't it?

A good day at home..listening to 80s n 90s music - flashback to the past - on MTV! let see..u can't touch this, ice ice baby, Mmmm MmmMmmMmm, sunny came home, fly by sugar ray....o yes i wouldn't complain if everyday was like this.

Yesterday i headed down to NUS for matriculation fair 2009 to mann the swimming booth with sandy and we were both surprised at how unspectacular the place was! Few people, nothing much going on~ Maybe it's because it was still early in the day~

Beef noodles for lunch from angmokio..awesome..cobrastarship ft. Leighton meester good girls go bad...And this reminds me of an age-long debate between me and the school gang! leighton the aspiring adult actress or blake the irrepressible pyt on the edge of a-list megastardom?i'm obviously rooting for the latter, but it's not easy to explain why! blair from GG is pretty i'll give her that..but she doesn't evoke anything or excite as does Serena vdw!~ before we all pin that on raging hormones, i feel that it's really not about hotness. It's just that one has the look, while the other hasn't...sad but true~

moving on, today is ION excursion. J and i we've not looked around proper as yet so today will be our pioneering mission. Nokia is on J's agenda, dunkin donuts on mine...

O ya...and darnit! Curses to you darn module preference system! i got allocated a paltry lone module, and that happened to be my least favourite of the 5! ohhh comeonnnn u've gotta be kidding me! darnit..with 900+ points left in my programme account, i realize the demise that i surely must face in the coming weeks...o gosh..looks like i'll  be heading to the psych department alot for appeals, and next sem i'll be a bankrupt...sighs. O wells...luck of the draw they say.. I wish they'd come up with some stupid ranking system for module preference so as to have some sort of choosing system, not just randomly(as they say...)

hmm...now how do i put music up on my blog?

Final.Night.in.Vietnam

did some shopping yesterdayyyy~ bought about 3 t-shirts~~ i also wanted to see what the craze about chinese chess was in this country! so i decided to pit my wits against some old hand at An Dong Plaza whilst jeanne was shopping. I proved that a purple-haired foreigner CAN play chess by decimating his poor generals. In the end though, i decided not to embarrass him in front of his onlooking wife/kids/friends so i decided to use a sleight-of-hand that magically allowed him to sneak a narrow win(on purpose of course...as though there was a need to ask hmf.)

eggciting kinda day was today! went on a tour to gao-dai. Gaodai-ism is a religion which is really a combination of many other religions! we then went by the cu chi tunnels! met tons of foreigners like myself. Nice meeting aaron, matt and alan. photos from gaodai temple, cu chi tunnels.

gaodai-ism

Booby traps in cu chi.

tmrw we'll be heading back to singapore~ so sadddddd... but oh wells i had fun so what can i expect? leaving would've always been a pain no matter when it was so i guess there's no time like the present~ enjoying a good slugfest by vika azarenka vs serena williams. Me hopes the dainty girl can hold out against the bulldozer williams is! Go vika! Anyways i'm out of t-shirts so i guess i'll have to dig into my stash of 3 new tshirts heheheheheh.. busy day tmrw gotta catch a flight too at 240pm! rehi singapore soon! signing out.

AnDongMarketHereWeGo

Goodmorning vietnam!

yesterday we headed to chinatown! where they had tons of

spices/fabrics/clothes/footwear/food/hats! like TONS. Also went to visit a temple kinda place..

Wednesday we're heading back to singapore so better make today a good day! hope it doesn't rain too!

yesterday was chinatown..

today = shopping!

Also...some random photos from my trip so far...it's a bit mixed up.. the first is from siemReap. the rest = Vietnam

Love this. Funny how i hardly see Jade Beer in Singapore.

Vietnam. This is a Thomas of Switzerland who stays at the same guesthouse as us. We were having pizza with him and Amanda. This ninja masseuse popped out of nowhere during dinner and tortured him. and then me.

Cathedral de Notre Dame.

Grey skies over HCMC.

purple hair boy blogging.

daythree.dayfour.dayfive.daysix

3.sunrise.breakfast.guesthouse.sleep.lunch.temples.shooting.sunset.apsaradinner.changehaircolour

AngKorWat.

AngKorWat(er-bottle)

shooting range! M16...notice the shell exitting? nice shot bro!

a random shot as we pass by a river..

sunset at angkorwat

4.breakfast.bustophnomphenh.meetCK.dinner(checkouthaircolour!).zzz

Changed to purple/blue/pink. Courtesy of jeanne.

Dinner in phnom phenh.

5.S21.palace.russianmarket.lunch.bustoHCMC.walktoMyMyarthouse.

S21--The museum of genocide.

Royal palace.

Russian Market.

6.crazyday.breakfastinhostel.lunch@pho24.boughtshades.searchfortailors.highlandcoffee.pasta4dinner.

Photo of the day@highland coffee.

7.herewego.

daytwo.

woke up damn early...but the partners in crime were fast asleep...so i spent two hours playing risk vs. com.

rosy's mega fry for brekkie.

angkorwat.

lunch.

angkortown.

rain + drenched.

tuktuk home.

met friends.

dinner.

dayone

airport.

tuktuk.

hostel.

lunch.

boat.

snakes.

dinner.

nightmarket. no photos.

pink'd purple'd and to siem reap we go

my hair is pink and purple! and off to siem reap in 4hours+!
jsut finished packing! whoO! took me all 40 minutes to pack for a 1 week trip! hope i din forget anything!~ gdnite!

rei ayanami

cannot really see from the camera! but think rei ayanami!



haha tmrw gonna add more purplee! (and blue if possible!)